Today will be the last day of Ramadhan 2006. i welcomed this holy month of Ramadhan with an unusual zest. may be the joyous spirit came from somewhere deep within me which i wasnt aware of before. it emerged and blossomed turning this Ramadhan into a very meaningful holy month. as the song from Raihan goes:
Ku mengharapkan Ramadhan kali ini sungguh makna
Agar dapat kulalui dengan sempurna
Selangkah demi selangkah...
the philosophy behind Ramadhan is nothing new to me. has been hammered into me since i was taught the fundamentals of Islam, its teachings, the 5 pillars and i began fasting as early as 7 years. as i started to have family, the usual practice during Ramadhan is more or less accustomed to the way of the head of the family practises, hence it largely depended on my husband.
our usual practice during previous Ramadhans went something like this - we usually had sahur at 5 am (meals prepared by my maid Rudy) and we usually went to sleep again, sometimes waking up late for the Subuh prayers (shamefully i admit sometimes we missed). and then the fasting and breaking up of the fast, as usual is a big ceremony of stuffing yourself like you wont see another morsel of food the next 10 years! after the huge meal, we would be too full to go to the tarawih prayers. my husband usually gave it a miss. initially i went with Aiza & Nur, but after a while going alone often raised eyebrows (may be it was only my illusion) then i stopped going at all.
if anyone could have seen me this time, they will say like "dah buang tebiat dia ni", because i could feel this difference with us (my husband and i). i never missed the tarawih prayers, if i didnt go to the mosque, i would do it at home, plus other sunnat prayers. the book "Himpunan Sembahyang Sunat" which i bought a few years back was put to full use. we would often wake up early hours to do more sunnat prayers. from sunat taubat, to tahajjjud, hajat, tasbih, and istikharah, i tried to do all. i tried as hard as i might not to go to sleep again after sahur, but watched the many religious forum (al kuliyyah), motivation talks, etc which the the TV stations broadcast everyday. our meals were also prepared in a moderate way, i tried to contain myself from buying so much dishes which usually end up in the bin anyway. so how that's different this time. even my husband commented the other day, "this is the most different Ramadhan".
for this Raya celebration, as usual we will spend it in Kelantan. which is no difference from the previous years. despite my mum being ill, as i have often reminded my husband that he should consider celebrating it with my family in KL this year because this could be our last Raya with her, he remained silent and stubborn. or when he was more exasperated, he exclaimed "you can go back on your own, just leave the kids behind." ok, i'll not dwell on that... a totally different subject matter.
i called mak last night and in her weakened state, she admitted that she cant prepare the raya meals. usually she would make the ketupat or the ketupat pulut (for her son-in-law), rendang ayam and daging and her famous sambal kacang. so this year my Akak from Kuantan will be cooking for the family instead. as usual Musa and his family will come back for the occassion. Tapa, Munshi and Dyla will also be spending with my parents, then taking off to their spouses' destination (Ulu Yam, Mentakab and Melaka).it has been so long since i celebrated with my siblings and parents that if i were given the chance, i would be so totally out of element among them. anyway, no use to ponder about that because i dont know whether that time will ever arrive.
some Hari raya wishes from me;
- To Akak and Ust Nurdin; Muaz, Nabila and Muzammil
- To Musa and Umi; Hakimi, Kida and Shikin
- To OD and Abg Mat; Anis, Anas and Ami
- To Tapa and Dis; Ashraf, Ikhsan and Caca
- To Munshi and Ayu; Muhaimin and Aina
- To Dyla and Ery; Sharmaine and Adam
Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri and Maaf Zahir Batin from Mak Uda & Pak Uda; Nur, Aiza and Aidid.
"Di hari raya
terkenang daku kepada si dia
kampung ku hijau nan jauh di mata
ayah serta bondaku ...."
Dendang Perantau (a perfect song for people like me).
No comments:
Post a Comment