When Kane and Abel fought their ways and also against each other in their vast business enterprises and became each other's no 1 worst enemy, they couldn't have thought or imagined that someday Florentyna and William Kane would fall in love and be married and they become in-laws and share a grand-daughter.
Thus is the circle of life, fates or simply Qada' and Qadar. Although the principle remains simple, in real life the lesson is always bitter, torturous, heart-rending, often left a metallic taste in your mouth...
i am at the moment feeling utterly hopeless at my life's situation. i know that God is at the helm of things, isn't it much better to let things slide on its own? isn't it less troublesome to just let the events in your life being managed by the Almighty? Oh, the feelings of just letting go... that's awesome! OK, that's how i'm telling you how hopeless i feel. not that we as humans have any power to change how things go, but we were supposed to charge forward, form our own destiny with hopes and prayers, aren't we? i'm saying that i'm at my deepest end with hopes and prayers, i'd say i've tried my best.
the best way for any other people to learn a good lesson is to experience it themselves. the malays were very smart with their idioms, if i could refresh one saying: 'berat mata memandang berat lagi bahu yang memikul'. yeah, that would fit my predicament with my siblings at the moment. none of them have actually undergone what i've been through, i dont think they understood an iota of my problem. it's so easy to stand there in their lofty positions; to judge, to criticize and to issue orders.
i've made a lot of mistakes in the past, but my decisions were never intended to cause pain to others. there were honest decisions, my ups and falls - a beautiful myriad of life's experiences. i've learnt lessons others have never thought possible to learn from, bitter events that some people only read in novels - i've gone through them all.
who are you people to say that i've earned less than to live my own life? when you hide behind your sham of a living? behind closed doors - you suffer and you cry? you wish for the better, but you were scared for a change? i've never been a hypocrite and i will not start now. just to assert a little bit of my revenge, i hope that you will experience some of my misery so that you know... so that you learn a bitter lesson ... so that life teaches you one of its most expensive lessons; you cannot underestimate Qada' and Qadar.
